On the Masculinity of God and Christ
©2005 Kimberly Hartfield

Is God masculine? God said in the Bible, “I am God and not a man, the Holy One in your midst (Hosea 11:9).” The Bible also tells us in John 4:24 that God is Spirit and that those who worship must worship in spirit and truth. If God is not a man and God is a Spirit, then is God masculine and why do we think of God in such a way. The Bible as we have it was written by the great prophets of the Hebrew culture, which was a patriarchal society. These prophets wrote the words of God under inspiration, but not without cultural influences on the way they presented the information God wanted us to have. We think of God as our heavenly father, and yet many of the descriptions of God and Christ in Scripture have what some consider to be more feminine characteristics, such as great sympathy, compassion, and emotion. God’s word also tells us that in heaven, we will be like the angels, which are neither male nor female (Matt. 22:30, Mark 12:25, Gal. 3:28). If we were made in the image of God and our spirits are neither male nor female, and neither are the angels, then we can assume that God is neither male nor female as well. Yet Jesus told us to pray Our Father in Heaven. When we say that God is our father, then it is meant in such a way as to denote that God is the source of us all, not that God is masculine in form. The word Father and Son also denotes an intimate relationship, not necessarily that of a father and son, though the relationship between the Father and the Son is that of a begotten heir, that is one drawn out of God, not one of adoption as we are adopted into the family of God. At the creation, God created humankind as male and female, both in God’s image. Yet God created Adam first then Eve. God took from all the qualities of God and created man in that image. Then God took the feminine qualities of God from the man and created woman. The Creator divided those qualities that God had given to mankind between the two of them so that the two together would be a unified picture of the attributes of God. God did not divide the original qualities of the physical and spiritual essence until man was first created. Then the division of that physical and spiritual essence between the man and the woman was made. The original Adam was the image of God, neither male nor female, or should I say instead, both male and female. Science tells us that humanbeings each have both the masculine and feminine hormones, estrogen and testosterone in varying degrees. Science also tells us that there are children born today, which are viewed as imperfect because they have both masculine and feminine physical characteristics and that though these hermaphrodite children appear as masculine, they are unable to procreate. It is now possible to surgically correct this defect much like God could have altered Adam to make him more masculine and created Eve from those feminine characteristics that God derived from Adam’s spiritual and physical essence. It could be that these are a clue to us as to how Adam [(wo)mankind] was originally created and possibly how we should view God and Christ, that is, as both masculine and feminine. We know that Christ was male as he was circumsized. Christ necessarily appeared to be masculine, for if he had appeared as a woman, he would not have been recognized as the Messiah in a patriarchal society. The scripture also tells us in Isaiah 53:2 that Christ had no attractiveness that we would be attracted to. It could be that Christ was one of these imperfect, or should I say perfect children. The scripture tells us in I Peter 2:24 that (S)He suffered every possible thing on the cross that we could suffer. If Christ were only a man, then how could he understand the sufferings of a woman? Yet if Christ were both masculine and feminine, then certainly (S)He could understand both men and women. Does having femine characteristics disqualify God or Christ from being masculine? No it does not. God is no less male, because (S)He is female. The femininity of God does not disqualify the masculinity of God, nor does the femininity of Christ disqualify the masculinity of Christ either. One of the greatest things about Christ’s ministry is the total respect (S)He showed to women along with the fact that (S)He allowed women to have a significant place in ministry. Some argue that women are not to teach men, and yet Jesus allowed women to proclaim both testimonies of his Messiahship and the resurrection to men in several instances in Scripture. In John 4:14-29 Christ ministered to the woman at the well, who then went into the town to tell the men that she had found the Christ. When Christ was first seen by Mary Madeline at the tomb in John 20:19, (S)He specifically sent her to bear witness to Christ’s brothers (disciples) what she had seen and what Christ had told her to tell them. There were also women who followed along with Christ and the disciples at their own expense and ministered along side them (Luke 8:3). Some have argued that there were no female disciples and so there should be no female ministers. Yet there were no disciples who were not Jewish either, and there are many ministers who are not Jewish. Christ came to reconcile us to God, and to end the curse of the fall of humankind. When (S)He died on the cross, then it was made possible for all of creation to be freed from that curse. God gave us the wisdom to know that through Christ we are free, along with the knowledge for the modern technology that allows us to free ourselves from the curse. Man no longer has to sweat for his bread, neither is woman still obliged to suffer through childbirth, nor is she subject to man’s rule, except where they are unregenerate and without Christ. Scripture tells us that there is no difference between us when we are in Christ (Gal.3:28). There is neither Greek nor Jew, male nor female, slave nor free. God is not a God who can be limited to a masculine definition created by a masculine patriarchal society. God is much greater than that. God is not a man and neither can man become a god. It’s time that the men in our societies realize that God has not given them exclusive rights to God and the Kingdom of God and to follow the example of respect and equality for women that Christ gave us. Including leadership roles in the Body of Christ.
- posted by Unknown @ 2:15 PM

 
The Spiritual Development of Children
Ó2004 Kimberly Hartfield, B.S.
Most parents could tell stories of their children’s spiritual awareness. It is from the spirit that a child’s imaginations arise. Children use their imagination to wander far beyond anything our adult minds might comprehend. They often sense the presence of good and evil spirits, sometimes seeing angels and ghosts, in spite of parental unbelief, much like the popular movie “The Sixth Sense”. Children need to find a way of expressing what their spirits sense. Parents need not suppress a child’s imagination as something unreal or unimportant, or they will effectively teach their children not to trust their primal intuition and imaginative gifts. As parents, we need to treasure their imaginations as valuable assets, which will eventually teach them to sort between the seen and unseen world. With imagination being one of the most valuable gifts God has given to humanity, Christian parent’s need to learn to shepherd their children’s imaginations more than any other capability. Parent’s who believe it is their responsibility to stifle their children’s imagination and intuition often hinder their children’s future response to a visionary prayer life. Yet the Holy Spirit wonderfully restores to the children of God the creativity of the spiritual realm of the imagination.
In Mathew18: 3-5 Jesus said, I say unto you, except you be changed and become as little children, you will not enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Whoever is humbled as a child will be greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. And whoever receives such a child in my name receives me This verse illustrates the importance of maintaining our spiritual inheritance in child-like ways, that is, in unwavering acceptance of God’s truth.
When children are young, they may not understand the theological implications of faith. They don’t reflect on the theoretical intricacies involved, but they do associate a word with an experience. Spiritual words that are experienced in a consistent spiritual context advance the atmosphere for the spiritual development of children. If they experience repetitious inconsistency between what they hear and what they see, the confusion they experience will ultimately be spiritually wounding to their souls. If children hear words about love and truth, but live with parents or others who contradict these, they will be spiritually disadvantaged. Children need a consistent environment to be able to associate the words of the gospel with a clear and positive experience. As they become older, children go beyond basic associations of experience into an experience of belonging to a faith-based community. When children feel they belong to a community of faith, they see that being a Christian isn’t just an idea in the mind, but that it’s a change of heart and a way of life.
God holds adults responsible for presenting our children with an environment in which their souls may spiritually thrive. That environment should be one with Biblical guidelines. Some appropriate verses are: Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother for this is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with you and that you may live long on the earth. Fathers do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Ephesians 6:1-4. Suffer the little children to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven. (Matthew19: 14)
Spiritual maturity comes to children sooner than some people want to believe. At a young age, they can understand about themselves and God, and they have a consciousness of sin. As they mature spiritually they will understand that they have a choice in their sin. The concept of repentance then follows. They have to understand that they have chosen to sin and genuinely feel regret that they did it. They must have this appropriate guilt and not just be sorry they were found out. At this point children can understand the concrete concept of Jesus’ redemption for us on the cross, that is, that He took our punishment in our stead in order to give us eternal life with the Father.
Another important passage describes a biblical scene, where a friend goes to a neighbor requesting food to set before a traveling friend who has come in the night. Don’t trouble me: the door is shut now and my children are in bed with me. I can’t get up and give you anything. Luke 11:7 During this period of time, children often slept along side their parents, and the time before going to sleep was a respected time for sharing God’s truth with children. It was deemed inappropriate to interrupt this special time. And yet Christ said that because of the friendship, he should rise up and give him whatever he needs. Yet too often, we sacrifice our children’s time with us for causes that seem more worthy. We need to be careful about neglecting their time with us for spiritual growth, even though we must sometimes do other worthy things.
Parent’s must build their own relationship with God, and then nurture their children’s relationship with God; or their children will inevitably feel the absence in every area of their lives, especially where spiritual growth is concerned. When peers test children’s concept of who they are, sometimes compelling them to have loyalties which often conflict with the spirituality they have been taught at home, those children need parents who have both understanding to know that their children must become their own persons, but who will also discipline consistently and firmly, so that they know while they are free to make their own mistakes; they are not free to escape the consequences of those mistakes. Discipline must have as its foundation our responsibility before God to build morality and spirituality. Both fathers and mothers must be strong in the discipline of the Lord. An inability to be pleasing and acceptable to others can be far more wounding to children than what we believe. They need the security of their parent’s discipline and love openly and consistently expressed.
Learning the demands of social life is the first step in the development of the conscience. Positive emotions when parenting and parental reliance on negotiation rather than direct control have also been connected with the development of children’s consciences. When parents find themselves refereeing between sibling rivalries or quarrelsome playtime exchanges, they must know when and where to enforce rules, but not fight their children’s battles for them, taking from them the lessons of the struggle. Parental love should not endeavor to take from a child the growth skills needed to live peaceably with others.
When parents want to teach the spiritual values of the sexual relationship they need to become the primary instructors in sex education. When parents answer questions openly and honestly, without embarrassment or anxiety, sexual being and functions will be communicated as a natural and healthy part of everyday life. Warnings and restrictions can be presented in that context without being interpreted by them as forbidden fruit to be partaken of outside of a spiritual union. If parents want children to know the facts of life within a Christian context before they have been significantly influenced by misinformation of peers and before being wounded by immoral media influences, they need to teach accurate and sensitively communicated information on sex before the child reaches puberty.
Continuing the line of thought in Mathew chapter 18, verse 6 goes on to say: But whoever offends one of these little ones, which believes in me, it would be better for him that a stone was hung around his neck and he was drowned in the depths of the sea. Current statistics show that one out of every three girls is molested or raped before the age of eighteen, many times by a father or father figure, or other close male-relative. Any kind of sexual abuse usually has a negative effect in a girl’s spiritual development, because of the reflection that relationship has on building trust in a Godhead that is primarily understood as masculine, though God in actuality is neither male nor female. Young girls have a great need to feel they are a pleasure to their father. A girl’s inner hope from her life with her father may either prevent or enable future relationships, including her spiritual relationship with God. A father’s most important duty is to create a sense of value and beauty in his daughters. His hugs and kisses need to be given generously in an implicit father-role with absolutely no sexual connotations for the spiritual growth of his daughters to develop in a healthy pattern.

For Further Reading:
*Restoring the Christian Family by Paula and John Sanford
*Parent’s Guide to the Spiritual Growth of Children: Helping Your Child Develop a Personal Faith Ed by John Trent, Rick Osborn and Kurt Bruner
Awake!
Awake and do rightful acts, for some of us do not have an understanding of God. I tell you this to your shame! (I Corinthians 15:34) Awake, you who sleep, arise from the deadness of sin, and Christ will enlighten your spirit. See that you walk carefully, not foolishly, but wisely, buying the time because the days are evil (Ephesians 5:14-16). It is high time to awake out of sleep: for now our salvation is nearer than when we once believed it was. The night is almost over and the day is at hand: let us throw off the works of darkness and let us put on the armor of light. Let us walk honestly as in the day, not in rioting and drunkenness, not in sensuality and loose living, not in strife and envying, but put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make not provision for physical desires gratifying its lusts (Romans 13:11-14).
Available 2004 Tracts Titles:
1. Abuse in the Marital Relationship
2. Adolescence
3. Anger and the Golden Rule
4. The behavioral Change of People
5. The Breast or the Bottle Issue
6. Childhood Sexual Abuse
7. Contraception and Birth-control
8. Discipline
9. Incest, Family, and the Church
10. Obedience and Submission of Women
11. Precepts and Principles concerning Women
12. Exploring Sexuality
13. Sexuality and Pornography
14. Understanding and Resolving Anger and Depression
15. Working Mothers
16. A Co-sleeping Arrangement: Sharing the Family Bed
17. A Woman’s Role in the Church
18. The Roman Road El Camino de Romanos
19. Marriage: Heaven on Earth or Hell in Disguise
20. On Divorce and Remarriage
21. A New Millennium of Faithful Women
22. Go Fish Ministries/ Go Fish Books
23. Joshua Mikel Memorial Fund for Victims of Sexual Violence
24. Go Fish Safe Haven for Victims of Sexual Violence
25. Wonderful Counselor Comforting: A Therapeutic Experience for Victims of Sexual and Domestic Violence
$1.00 Donation per tract appreciated. Single Tracts may be reproduced in its entirety including copyright and authorship information with permission of author. Make Checks payable to: Go Fish Books.
About the Author
Kimberly Marie Hartfield is a mother of eight children and a Masters Level student at William Carey College in Hattiesburg, MS. She received her B.S. degree in 2004. She has studied primarily in the areas of Psychology, with minors in Religion and English. Kim has personally experienced the healing hand of God in facing many of the issues discussed in this series of tracts. God has brought her through diverse tribulations during the course of her lifetime, including being a victim of sexual, physical, emotional abuse, a drunk driving accident, spousal pornography addiction, adultery, divorce, remarriage, incarceration, and having experienced two miscarriages and various other trials. Through God’s merciful forgiveness of her own sins and His grace given to her to forgive those who have been her stumbling block, she has overcome these adversities. She believes that God has blessed her with the ability to confront and relate these issues to the Christian community in the writing of these tracts. Kim has been called to the homeland mission field of North America and hopes to be able to use these tracts as a tool for the ministry of witnessing to the grace of God and comforting His people with the truth of His mercy. She claims II Corinthians 3 & 4 as her calling, which states: “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” As she herself has received the gift of God’s healing, she hopes to be able to bring the peace beyond understanding to others in God’s Kingdom with the message of His mercy and grace. Kim’s love for the Lord, along with her passion for writing has drawn her to explore these commonly experienced crisis issues from the perspective of her own experience in the hope that she may bring an empathetic and compassionate insight to God’s people. The views expressed in this series of tracts are strictly her own insights acquired from personal experience and diligent study of the related topics and God’s word concerning them. Though she is an ordained minister, her views should not be considered authoritative. She believes that the Christian community’s ultimate authority is the guidance of the human heart by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God.
A
Christian Perspective
On
The Spiritual Development of Children
©2004

For Ordering information call or contact:

Office 601-296-7331
Action #601-270-7405

go fish@jesuslovesu2.every1.net

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Books 4 Jesus
1707H Lincoln Road
Hattiesburg, MS 39402

Go Fish Books

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiration
Second Hand Books
- posted by Unknown @ 6:33 PM

 
A Christian Perspective on
What Makes a Personality
Ó2004 Kimberly Hartfield
It is generally agreed by most people today that a person’s personality is made up out of some combination of innate qualities and environmental influences. From a Christian perspective, we understand that man is made in the image of God, and yet that image is believed to be a fallen one. How much man has retained of the image of God cannot be ascertained, but we do seem to have a limited ability to possess some of God’s own attributes. We can love, though our love is not uniquely unconditional as is God’s love for mankind. We have the capacity for compassion for our fellowman, the ability to make choices that affect ourselves and our fellowman, the knowledge of good and evil to make those choices real, and finally the perseverance to overcome the choices that mankind makes. We believe that God is compassionate, knowledgeable, makes decisions and is longsuffering toward mankind, though we believe, as well, that God is just, ultimately judging us by the life choices we make.
We, as Christians, believe that mankind has a fallen image, or self, that cannot be restored fully in this life. Mankind seems to have an evil disposition, one of selfishness that is believed by most Christians to have begun in the Garden of Eden, when Adam and Eve coveted the knowledge of good and evil in order to become like God. This innate selfishness is ingrained in the personality of man, and only when man learns love for God and love for others can he truly be free from this innate evil. But even when man is freed from the bondage of selfishness, its strong pull on the personality lingers. Rarely can one find the total unselfishness to live for others that Christ Jesus exampled for us. Even when we do good things, our motives are contaminated by our own desires for self-worship and other-worship.
Mankind’s struggle for balance in the personality between the unselfish image of God within him and the selfish reflection of Satan, who was the first to covet God’s likeness, has been an ongoing battle of spiritual warfare since the fall of man in Genesis. The innate image of God, which is the spirit of man, is at war with the environmental effects of evil, the presence of Satanic influences in the world. Only through the Son of God, Jesus Christ, can man overcome the world. The Scripture says that in the world we will have troubles, but to take heart, because He has overcome the world. When we put our faith in Him, we can overcome the self-serving, self-centered world of evil.
God’s image in man (the nature element) or Satan’s influence on him (the nurture element) can influence many components of man’s personality. The elements of our mental processes such as love, compassion, knowledge, wisdom(our ability to use knowledge for good), cunning(our ability to use knowledge for evil), and even our sexuality, which is for the most part a mental process, and which God created for good but man has perverted for evil, can all be influenced for good or for evil. When our cognitive processes are focused on God in us, rather than on ourselves in the world, then we allow God’s spirit to control us rather than our own selfishness, which is easily influenced by our environment.
If we focus instead on our environment, we tend to see what we personally lack, rather than what we have, just as Adam and Eve did. They claimed the right to the tree of knowledge of good and evil, disregarding the limits that God had put on them. They ignored the beautiful garden God had freely given them to enjoy, while taking the fruit of knowledge without the consent of the Giver of all good things. When they crossed God’s original boundaries for mankind, and mankind’s selfish unconcern for His authority was revealed, the consequences for man’s sin entered the world. The evil influence of Satanic forces, along with the consequences of suffering man brings on himself by his own impulsive selfishness defines the boundaries of God’s image in mankind.
We have the capacity and potential for much of God’s image to reflect in our personalities, but if we focus continually on ourselves and what our environment seems to deny us, then God’s image is squelched in our souls. Without this spiritual stimulus then man is more susceptible to the presence of evil within his environment, which in turn limits God’s presence in our lives, for God will not abide in the presence of evil. He chooses to limit His association with those who are inclined toward evil continually, though for those who are repentant He makes concessions.
When we do not seek God, nor seek to maintain His image within ourselves, then God necessarily gives us over to our reprobate minds. Only when we repent of the evil we choose to let rule over us, will God’s Spirit abide in our spirit. When man’s locus of control is inwardly self-driven but God-controlled, his personality will reflect a secure confidence in God’s love for him with a lack of selfishness and the need to do for others within the limits he has defined for himself and that God has defined for him, as well. When man’s locus of control is externally motivated by his world rather than by God, then he will generally reflect an innate selfishness and self-defeating attitude that often results in disrespect and blame for others, without accepting responsibility for his own failures.
Our thankfulness to God for his goodness, rather than our covetousness for what does not rightfully belong to us, is the litmus test of our personality. If we are generally optimistic and grateful to God then we reflect more of His image in ourselves. If we are more often pessimistic seeing only what we seem to lack and lean toward the selfish desire of attaining those things, then we reflect the image of Satan. Greed and covetousness are characteristic of Satan’s influence in the lives of mankind. These dominant personality traits in mankind divide the sheep from the wolves in God’s Kingdom.
Awake!
Awake and do rightful acts, for some of us do not have an understanding of God. I tell you this to your shame! (I Corinthians 15:34) Awake, you who sleep, arise from the deadness of sin, and Christ will enlighten your spirit. See that you walk carefully, not foolishly, but wisely, buying the time because the days are evil (Ephesians 5:14-16). It is high time to awake out of sleep: for now our salvation is nearer than when we once believed it was. The night is almost over and the day is at hand: let us throw off the works of darkness and let us put on the armor of light. Let us walk honestly as in the day, not in rioting and drunkenness, not in sensuality and loose living, not in strife and envying, but put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make not provision for physical desires gratifying its lusts (Romans 13:11-14).
Available 2004 Tracts Titles:
1. Abuse in the Marital Relationship
2. Adolescence
3. Anger and the Golden Rule
4. The behavioral Change of People
5. The Breast or the Bottle Issue
6. Childhood Sexual Abuse
7. Contraception and Birth-control
8. Discipline
9. Incest, Family, and the Church
10. Obedience and Submission of Women
11. Precepts and Principles concerning Women
12. Exploring Sexuality
13. Sexuality and Pornography
14. Understanding and Resolving Anger and Depression
15. Working Mothers
16. A Co-sleeping Arrangement: Sharing the Family Bed
17. A Woman’s Role in the Church
18. The Roman Road El Camino de Romanos
19. Marriage: Heaven on Earth or Hell in Disguise
20. On Divorce and Remarriage
21. A New Millennium of Faithful Women
22. Go Fish Ministries/ Go Fish Books
23. Joshua Mikel Memorial Fund for Victims of Sexual Violence
24. Go Fish Safe Haven for Victims of Sexual Violence
25. Wonderful Counselor Comforting: A Therapeutic Experience for Victims of Sexual and Domestic Violence
$1.00 Donation per tract appreciated. Single Tracts may be reproduced in its entirety including copyright and authorship information with permission of author. Make Checks payable to: Go Fish Books.
About the Author
Kimberly Marie Hartfield is a mother of eight children and a Masters Level student at William Carey College in Hattiesburg, MS. She received her B.S. degree in 2004. She has studied primarily in the areas of Psychology, with minors in Religion and English. Kim has personally experienced the healing hand of God in facing many of the issues discussed in this series of tracts. God has brought her through diverse tribulations during the course of her lifetime, including being a victim of sexual, physical, emotional abuse, a drunk driving accident, spousal pornography addiction, adultery, divorce, remarriage, incarceration, and having experienced two miscarriages and various other trials. Through God’s merciful forgiveness of her own sins and His grace given to her to forgive those who have been her stumbling block, she has overcome these adversities. She believes that God has blessed her with the ability to confront and relate these issues to the Christian community in the writing of these tracts. Kim has been called to the homeland mission field of North America and hopes to be able to use these tracts as a tool for the ministry of witnessing to the grace of God and comforting His people with the truth of His mercy. She claims II Corinthians 3 & 4 as her calling, which states: “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” As she herself has received the gift of God’s healing, she hopes to be able to bring the peace beyond understanding to others in God’s Kingdom with the message of His mercy and grace. Kim’s love for the Lord, along with her passion for writing has drawn her to explore these commonly experienced crisis issues from the perspective of her own experience in the hope that she may bring an empathetic and compassionate insight to God’s people. The views expressed in this series of tracts are strictly her own insights acquired from personal experience and diligent study of the related topics and God’s word concerning them. Though she is an ordained minister, her views should not be considered authoritative. She believes that the Christian community’s ultimate authority is the guidance of the human heart by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God.
A
Christian Perspective
on
What Makes a
Personality

©2004

For Ordering information call or contact:

Office 601-296-7331
Action #601-270-7405

go fish@jesuslovesu2.every1.net

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Books 4 Jesus
1707H Lincoln Road
Hattiesburg, MS 39402

Go Fish Books

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiration
Second Hand Books
- posted by Unknown @ 6:32 PM

 
Go Fish
Gift of Faith & Inspiration Safe Haven

Kimberly Hartfield ©2003

Gift of Faith & Inspiration Safe Haven is a program designed for helping women and children who need assistance getting out of abusive relationships. The Go FISH program seeks to help women and children stay out of the abusive relationship by raising self esteem through education, inspiration, and modification of physical circumstances. We will attempt to educate women to the options and possibilities of seeking a higher education, or resume preparation for those who do not choose to go further in their education and need to reenter the work force. We will attempt to inspire women with godly principles of faith and lifestyle examples. We will modify physical circumstances by encouraging the victim to remove herself from the abusive relationship in order to stop enabling the abuser to continue the abusive behavior. If available, rooms will be provided for women and their children in a non-disclosed location for temporary shelter until other arrangements can be made when there is imminent danger or at the discretion of the founders. Women will be required to keep locations secret from friends and family, or any other person not directly involved with the program. Physical circumstances will also be modified by providing food, clothing, and self-esteem building makeovers when necessary or requested. Donations of time, money, food, shelter, and clothing will be solicited for these purposes.
Reputable reading material will be made available for self-counsel, while recommendations will be made for those wishing to seek professional psychological help or legal counsel. We will provide loans of various self-help educational and inspirational books and we offer a series of life focused tracts written from a Christian perspective, which will be made available to women in the program free of charge. We will also offer a support group consisting of women who are seeking to remove themselves from abusive relationships and mentors who have successfully removed themselves from abusive relationships.
Most abused women, along with their children, are caught up in or have been in a codependent cycle of abuse that enables the abuser to continue in the abusive behavior patterns. These women usually make several attempts to leave the relationship before they are successfully freed from the strongholds of the codependent rhythms. One reason for this is that these women have unusually low self-esteems often stemming from earlier abuses such as child abuse, childhood sexual abuse, rape, or other traumatic events. Another reason is that the men in their lives exhibit such a powerful psychological influence on them due to various forms of abuse such as mental, physical, or sexual abuse. One more reason women choose to remain in abusive relationships is a strong religious background which seemingly discourages or prohibits divorce, even under intolerable circumstances.
Mental abuse includes intimidation tactics such as hitting or kicking the air or surfaces near the victim, and any threat of harm to the victim, or the victims’ loved ones, personal belongings, pets, etc. Physical abuse includes behaviors that often, but not always, leave marks and bruises like slapping, hitting, biting, pinching, kicking, burning, pressure holds, etc. Sexual abuse includes any sexual behavior that coerces or forces the victim to do or be exposed to unwanted sexual conduct or materials used for sexual stimuli such as pornography and sex toys. While pornography is used to lower the inhibitions of women to uncommon and devious sex acts, they are coerced or forced to perform these deviant acts against their will by their abusive partners. Loving relationships do not seek to control or manipulate, but is mutually satisfying to both partners.
For Salvation in Christ
Romans
1:16 I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto Salvation to every one that believes . . .
3:24-25 Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus: Whom God has set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of past sins, through the forbearance of God. 6:4-5 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like Christ was raised up from the dead, by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in the newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection . . . 10:9-10 If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved. For with the heart man believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
Available 2002 Tracts Titles:
1. Abuse in the Marital Relationship
2. Adolescence
3. Anger and the Golden Rule
4. The Behavioral Change of People
5. The Breast or Bottle Issue
6. Childhood Sexual Abuse
7. Contraception and Birth-control
8. Discipline
9. Incest, the Family, and the Church
10. Obedience and Submission of Women
11. Precepts and Principles Concerning Women
12. Exploring Sexuality
13. Sexuality and Pornography
14. Understanding and Resolving Anger and Depression
15. Working Mothers
16. A Co-sleeping Arrangement: Sharing the Family Bed
17. A Woman’s Role in the Church
18. The Roman Road El Camino de Romanos

$1.00 donation per tract, 10 for $5, 25 for $10, 50 for $15, or 100 for $25 Single tracts may be reproduced in its entirety including copyright and authorship information with permission of author and any donation. $1 per $10 will be donated to the Joshua Mikel Memorial Fund for victims of childhood sexual abuse or violent sexual assault. Make Checks Payable to: Go Fish. Books 4 Jesus


About the Author
Kimberly Marie Hartfield is a 39-year-old mother of eight children and a full time senior student at William Carey College in Hattiesburg, MS. She expects to receive her first degree within the year 2004. She has studied primarily in the areas of Religion and Psychology, dedicating her talents to the Lord Jesus Christ. Kim has personally experienced the healing hand of God in facing many of the issues discussed in this series of tracts. God has brought her through diverse tribulations during the course of her lifetime, including being a victim of sexual, physical, and mental abuse, a drunk driving accident, pornography addiction, adultery, divorce, remarriage, incarceration, and having experienced two miscarriages and various other trials. Through God’s merciful forgiveness of her own sins and His grace given to her to forgive those who have been her stumbling block, she has overcome these adversities. She believes that God has blessed her with the ability to confront and relate these issues to the Christian community in the writing of these tracts. Kim has been called to the homeland mission field of North America and hopes to be able to use these tracts as a tool for the ministry of witnessing to the grace of God and comforting His people with the truth of His mercy. She claims II Corinthians 3 & 4 as her calling, which states: “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” As she herself has received the gift of God’s healing, she hopes to be able to bring the peace beyond understanding to others in God’s Kingdom with the message of His mercy and grace. Kim’s love for the Lord, along with her passion for writing has drawn her to explore these commonly experienced crisis issues from the perspective of her own experience in the hope that she may bring an empathetic and compassionate insight to God’s people. The views expressed in this series of tracts are strictly her own insights acquired from personal experience and diligent study of the related topics and God’s word concerning them. Her views should not under any circumstance be considered authoritative. She believes that the Christian community’s ultimate authority is the guidance of the human heart by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God.

Go Fish

Gift of
Faith & Inspiration
Safe Haven

©2003
For Ordering information contact:
Jesuslvsukhrtfld@cs.com
Or
gofishbooks@jesus
lovesu2.every1.net

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Books 4 Jesus
76 Mims Rd
Hattiesburg, MS 39401

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiration
Second Hand Books


God Bless You!
Get Hooked and Go Fish!
- posted by Unknown @ 6:30 PM

 

- posted by Unknown @ 6:25 PM

 
A New Millennium of Faithful Women
©2004 Rev. Kimberly Hartfield, B.S.

The new millennium has brought with it a new generation of young women. On the surface they are liberated from the strongholds of a patriarchal society of past centuries and most cultures. But in reality young women today are not much different than our mothers and grandmothers. We want all the same things they did, including a husband who truly loves us for who we are, a family that respects the efforts we make to craft better lives for them, and a self that nurtures our innermost needs in a way that does not forget who we are. Unfortunately, these things seem to evade us in this fast-paced world we live in. We grow up with these ideals, only to be faced with the realities of a husband who only loves us if, children who are disrespectful to us despite our efforts to maintain homes, jobs, school, etc., and finally a self that forgets who we really are when confronted by the harsh realities that we are not who the world would like us to be. We are faithful, even when life hits us dead in the face; we are strong, even when the world would like us to be weak; we are courageous, even when the world would like us to cower to its whims of change.
Even with these evidences of might, many women today are still living in the past ages of self-defeat, catering their lives to serving the temporal realms of sensuality, rather than serving the spiritual realms of the godly. We are servants in this world; either we will be servants of sin and live in defeat, or we will be servants of God and live victorious lives through His Son Jesus, who, by the way, treated women with utmost respect and love. When we seek love in the sensual realm without seeking it equally in the spiritual realm, ultimately we will not find what we are looking for. More than likely, we will find lust, rather than love. For man is human with physical needs; just as women are human with physical needs. When women let themselves be taken in by the lustful desires of man, without the aid of the spiritual commitment of love and marriage, then we will ultimately find ourselves lost in a world with little hope. But not entirely without hope, because even if we have found ourselves in these very circumstances, then we can awaken our spiritual eyes in wedded bliss to the husband that Christ longs to be for us. A Man who truly loves us and wants what is best for us; A God who knows the most intimate details of our being and who loves us anyway. When we place all our hopes and dreams in a physical union, and not in the union of our hearts toward God, then I am afraid we will be severely disappointed.
Many young women today, just as in past centuries live the early part of their lives building up a storehouse of hopes and dreams about love and marriage, and when they finally have it, find that it is still not enough. There is something missing. Earthly love is just not fulfilling. Often we wind up in divorce courts, DHS offices, homeless shelters, or poverty stricken homes with two, three or four kids, no husband, no job, no money, and seemingly no way out. Our previous husbands oftentimes live a more liberated and financially stable lifestyle after the divorce, while we women live struggling from day to day, dependant on government benefits just to make ends meet. Where is the liberation that the world has promised us? Where is the liberation that time has promised us? Where is the liberation of the new millennium?
Today, I tell you as a woman, we women will not find our liberation in the love or the lust of a man, in the respect of a job title, in the independence of the divorce courts, or in any other worldly thing which promises us freedom. Our freedom is found in serving a risen Lord and Savior, who is the only prince who will ever come riding up on a white horse to save us. And He will carry with Him a sword of truth! It will either pierce us through or cut our ropes of bondage. If we spend our temporal lives seeking love in all the wrong places, while forgetting His unconditional love for us, which would redeem us from all sin, then that truth will pierce our hearts when we see Him in His glory. But if we seek His undying love for us with our whole hearts, renouncing the temporal lives we once lived, then He will cut the ropes of sin and bondage and truly liberate us. Yet, we must seek Him in faith and truth! We must know that His shed blood on the cross of Calvary was the result of a love for us that He felt was worth dying for. He knew that mankind and womankind would only be liberated from sin through love. While we were yet sinners, He died for us!
He knew that through the love that He showed for us, we would come to love Him. He loved us first, and through the eyes of faith, we love Him back. He loves us not with a temporal love, but with an ethereal love, which frees us from the judgment of sin for all eternity. The liberty we have in His love first teaches us to love Him, and then teaches us to love ourselves, and in turn to love mankind. The love we have for ourselves is not that gratification of physical needs, but the gratification of a loving spiritual relationship with God and His Son Jesus. And that love for mankind is not a sensual love that gratifies man’s physical desires, but a spiritual love that gratifies His need for a spiritual relationship with God and His Son Jesus as well. And yet when we have this spiritual relation with God, He provides for our physical needs as well. So I challenge this new millennium of faithful women to live as servants to the Lord, not seeking temporal love, which may or may not last this lifetime, but to seek an ethereal love which will follow us through to eternity. If we seek God first, and ask Him to be our Spiritual Husband, then we will not be so quick to fall for the first physical man who comes along and tries to sweep us off our feet. For, only a godly man can come close to loving us as Christ does, indeed. And even then, he is human, and we will have disappointments. But when the disappointments come, we will not be devastated, for we will know there is a greater love in Heaven who will never fail us, nor leave us.
Awake!
Awake and do rightful acts, for some of us do not have an understanding of God. I tell you this to your shame! (I Corinthians 15:34) Awake, you who sleep, arise from the deadness of sin, and Christ will enlighten your spirit. See that you walk carefully, not foolishly, but wisely, buying the time because the days are evil (Ephesians 5:14-16). It is high time to awake out of sleep: for now our salvation is nearer than when we once believed it was. The night is almost over and the day is at hand: let us throw off the works of darkness and let us put on the armor of light. Let us walk honestly as in the day, not in rioting and drunkenness, not in sensuality and loose living, not in strife and envying, but put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make not provision for physical desires gratifying its lusts (Romans 13:11-14).
- posted by Unknown @ 6:22 PM

 
An Essay on

Motherhood
©2002 Kimberly Hartfield

Motherhood means seeing each my children as individuals, loving them as equals, respecting them as little people. It means not seeing their imperfections as permanent flaws, but as opportunities to learn more about themselves. It means showing them my own imperfections, while trusting that they can also learn from me and become better than I ever hoped to be.
Motherhood means giving life to a life unlived, it means dreaming of things yet undreamed, and sustaining hope in a hopeless world. It means untiring prayer in exhausting circumstances; it means choosing to love them when my children are unlovable, and leading them through a wilderness of sin when all they can see is a godless generation before them. It means showing them God in that godless world, and remaining faithful to Him when my own and their faith is failing.
Motherhood entails an absolute acceptance of who each of my children are, a firm spiritual guidance in an evil and ungodly world, and an unconditional love and forgiveness when I am disappointed in their words or actions. It confirms to me that life is not without hope, that the future is in God’s hands, and that my life will continue when I have gone on to be with Him.
Motherhood is the greatest gift God gave to womankind, to know that we are instruments in His Creation, to know that we participated in His purpose and plan. Motherhood is life, and hopes, and dreams; it is failures and disappointments, repentance and forgiveness. It is perseverance in parenting a new people for Jesus, overcoming life’s trials through Him who overcame the world, and showing the next generation how to overcome the world by the word of their testimony and by the Lamb of God. It means sharing the truth of Christ’s redemptive plan to a new generation that they may go unto all the world. . . .






About the Author
Kimberly Marie Hartfield is a 38-year-old mother of eight children and a full time student at William Carey College in Hattiesburg, MS. She expects to receive her first degree within the year 2003. She has studied primarily in the areas of Religion, English, and Psychology. She began writing at a young age, both journalizing and poetry, and has continued to enjoy writing throughout her adulthood. She has dedicated her talents to the Lord Jesus Christ and believes that she can be used of God if she is willing and faithful, even in her flawed human condition.
Kim has personally experienced the healing hand of God in facing many of the issues discussed in this series of tracts. God has brought her through many trials during the course of her lifetime, including being a victim of sexual, physical, and mental abuse, a drunk driving accident, pornography addiction, adultery, divorce, remarriage, being jailed, and having experienced two miscarriages and various other trials. Through God’s merciful forgiveness of her own sins and His grace given to her to forgive those who have been her stumbling block, she has overcome these adversities. God has blessed her with the ability to confront and relate these issues to the Christian community in the writing of these tracts.
Kim has been called to the homeland mission field of North America and hopes to be able to use these tracts as a tool for the ministry of witnessing to the grace of God and comforting His people with the truth of His mercy. She claims II Corinthians 3 & 4 as her calling, which states: “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” As she herself has received the gift of God’s healing in mind, body, soul, and spirit, she hopes to be able to bring the peace beyond understanding to others in God’s Kingdom with the message of His healing mercy and grace.
Kim’s love for the Lord, along with her passion for writing has drawn her to explore these commonly experienced crisis issues from the perspective of her own experience in the hope that she may bring an empathetic and compassionate insight to God’s people. The views expressed in this series of tracts are strictly her own insights acquired from personal experience and diligent study of the related topics and God’s word concerning them. Her views should not under any circumstance be considered authoritative. She believes that the Christian community’s ultimate authority is the guidance of the human heart by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God in the texts of the Holy Scripture.
For Salvation in Christ
Romans
1:16 I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto Salvation to every one that believes . . .
3:24-25 Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus: Whom God has set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of past sins, through the forbearance of God.
5:10 For if when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.
6:4-5 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like Christ was raised up from the dead, by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in the newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection . . .
10:8-10 . . . The word is nigh thee, even in your mouth, and in your heart: that is, the word of faith, which we preach; That if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved. For with the heart man believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.

Available 2002 Tracts Titles:
1. A Christian Woman’s Perspective on Working Mothers
2. An Essay on Motherhood
3. A Christian Perspective on Discipline
4. A Christian Woman’s Perspective on Contraception and Birth-control
5. A Christian Woman’s Response to The Breast or Bottle Issue
6. A Christian Perspective on Adolescence
7. A Christian Response to Childhood Sexual Abuse
8. A Christian Woman’s Response to Abuse in the Marital Relationship
9. One Christian’s Response to Sexuality and Pornography
10. One Christian’s Perspective on Sexuality

($1.00 per tract, 10 for $5, 25 for $10, 50 for $15, or 100 for $25) Single tracts may be reproduced in its entirety including copyright and authorship information with permission of author and a fee of $50 for unlimited reproduction.

An
Essay
on Motherhood

For Ordering information contact:
Jesuslvsukhrtfld@cs.com

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Books 4 Jesus
31 Shoemake Drive
Hattiesburg, MS 39402

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiration
Second Hand Books
- posted by Unknown @ 4:35 PM

 
Australian Shepherds
©2003 Kimberly Hartfield

The Australian Shepherds of North America are believed to have come from a mix between several strands of Collie cattle dogs and the wild dingo in Australia. When the British came to Australia to raise cattle and sheep, they brought with them common herding dogs such as the black border collie, and the Lassie type collie which is primarily red in color. They bred with the wild dingo of the local territories, which were grayish to buff in color. Hence we have the Australian Shepherd, which ranges in color from solid black with white markings to red with white markings, and from blue merle, which is black mixed with grey giving it a bluish tint to red merles, which are a mixture of red and buff colors. Merles should not be bred together due to probable genetic abnormalties. There are also tri-colors, which have the deeper colors with tan and white markings.
Aussies came to North America with sheepherders sometime around 1800 and have remained pretty close to the original breed brought over from Australia. Aussies usually have medium to long hair with a slight wave to it, males generally having slightly longer hair than females. Occasionally a more short-haired animal will appear in litters, probably deriving from the dingo ancestry. Eye colors range from blue to hazel to brown, sometimes with different color eyes on the same animal. Aussies are medium to large dogs with females ranging from about 40 to 50 lbs and approximately 20” in height, while males range from about 50-60 lbs and are about 22” high.
Australian Shepherds are generally healthy animals and may live 10-12 years with proper care. Aussies are highly active dogs, which have been bred for working dogs. They will naturally “herd” chickens, children, vehicles, or anything else if they are not properly trained to bridle their natural instincts. They do not necessarily need a large yard to run in, but it is preferable to have ample space for an energetic animal. As long as they are adequately given time and attention from their owners, they do fine most anywhere. They love to play ball and Frisbee, and they love water play. Any regularly structured activity will bridle that natural instinct and energy.
Aussies are very intelligent as well as active. They were bred for the intelligence to out think their herds and have been known to outsmart their owners on many occasions. Aussies are also very social animals and need to be included in family activities as much as possible. They are both quick learners and very loyal animals that love to please their owners, so they can be trained quite easily. When properly trained, a commanding voice is usually all the discipline needed. They have very good guarding instincts, naturally territorial and possessive, so they are very good watchdogs also. They are generally good-natured with children and are naturally protective over them, but they may try to herd running children and may even nip at their heels if left unattended and untrained. As with any dog, very small children should never be left unattended with them.
Good full-blooded pet quality Aussies sell for between $150 to $300 with or without papers. Full-blooded breeding quality puppies sell for between $300- $1000 with papers. The initial expense of buying a puppy is soon repaid by a loyal family companion for years to come. All puppies should be regularly wormed, vaccinated, properly sheltered, and fed with an appropriate diet for longevity. The needs of Australian Shepherds are intellectual, emotional, and physical, so Aussie puppies should be given lots of love and attention, as well as ample physical needs.

For Salvation in Christ
Romans
1:16 I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto Salvation to every one that believes . . .
3:24-25 Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus: Whom God has set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of past sins, through the forbearance of God. 6:4-5 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like Christ was raised up from the dead, by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in the newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection . . . 10:9-10 If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved. For with the heart man believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
Available 2002 Tracts Titles:
1. Abuse in the Marital Relationship
2. Adolescence
3. Anger and the Golden Rule
4. The Behavioral Change of People
5. The Breast or Bottle Issue
6. Childhood Sexual Abuse
7. Contraception and Birth-control
8. Discipline
9. Incest, the Family, and the Church
10. Obedience and Submission of Women
11. Precepts and Principles Concerning Women
12. Exploring Sexuality
13. Sexuality and Pornography
14. Understanding and Resolving Anger and Depression
15. Working Mothers
16. A Co-sleeping Arrangement: Sharing the Family Bed
17. A Woman’s Role in the Church

$1.00 donation per tract, 10 for $5, 25 for $10, 50 for $15, or 100 for $25 Single tracts may be reproduced in its entirety including copyright and authorship information with permission of author and any donation. $1 per $10 will be donated to the Joshua Mikel Memorial Fund for victims of childhood sexual abuse or violent sexual assault. Make Checks Payable to: Go Fish. Books 4 Jesus


About the Author
Kimberly Marie Hartfield is a 38-year-old mother of eight children and a full time senior student at William Carey College in Hattiesburg, MS. She expects to receive her first degree within the year 2004. She has studied primarily in the areas of Religion and Psychology. Kim’s hobbies include writing, reading, gardening, raising and breeding Australian Shepherds, and maintaining a goldfish pond. Kim has personally experienced the healing hand of God in facing many of the issues discussed in this series of tracts. God has brought her through diverse tribulations during the course of her lifetime, including being a victim of sexual, physical, and mental abuse, a drunk driving accident, pornography addiction, adultery, divorce, remarriage, incarceration, and having experienced two miscarriages and various other trials. Through God’s merciful forgiveness of her own sins and His grace given to her to forgive those who have been her stumbling block, she has overcome these adversities. She believes that God has blessed her with the ability to confront and relate these issues to the Christian community in the writing of these tracts. Kim has been called to the homeland mission field of North America and hopes to be able to use these tracts as a tool for the ministry of witnessing to the grace of God and comforting His people with the truth of His mercy. She claims II Corinthians 3 & 4 as her calling, which states: “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” As she herself has received the gift of God’s healing, she hopes to be able to bring the peace beyond understanding to others in God’s Kingdom with the message of His mercy and grace. Kim’s love for the Lord, along with her passion for writing has drawn her to explore these commonly experienced crisis issues from the perspective of her own experience in the hope that she may bring an empathetic and compassionate insight to God’s people. The views expressed in this series of tracts are strictly her own insights acquired from personal experience and diligent study of the related topics and God’s word concerning them. Her views should not under any circumstance be considered authoritative. She believes that the Christian community’s ultimate authority is the guidance of the human heart by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God.



Australian Shepherds
©2003
Full Blooded (No papers)
AUSTRALIAN SHEPARD PUPPIES
Blacks & Red Chocolates
Males $125
Females $100 OBO
CALL KIM AT 544-0500
or contact me at
gofishbooks@
jesuslovesu2.every1.net

For Ordering information contact:
gofishbooks@jesus
lovesu2.every1.net

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Books 4 Jesus
76 Mims Rd
Hattiesburg, MS 39401

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiration
Second Hand Books


God Bless You!


- posted by Unknown @ 10:10 PM

 
Are You SAD?
(Sexually Abused Dependent)
©2002 Kimberly Hartfield
Sexual abuse of a child is any inappropriate exposing of a child to any sexual purpose by anyone who has influence on the child, without concern for the child’s well-being. Young children need to be aware of the difference between good and bad touching. Hugs and kisses are fine if you want them, but you never have to do everything an adult or another child tells you to do if they are trying to get you to do something that makes you feel “funny” or strange. You can and must say “no” to any touching or behavior that makes you feel uncomfortable; and you should tell a trusted adult as soon as possible if something like this happens to you.
You should never be forced or coerced against your will into sexual activities by anyone. When you say no, then your no should be respected. If you are abused or assaulted in any way, the abuser has committed a crime and should be turned over to the proper authorities (police). The first step in recovery is for the victim to understand that the abuser betrayed her and to tell the secret to a trusted adult. When victims keep the secret, it makes it possible for the abuser to repeat the crime against her or others. In order to stop the abusive behavior, victims must be willing to speak out and reveal the identity of their abusers to someone they trust in authority.
Children also need to understand that sexual abuse or assault is not always carried out by a stranger or by an adult. Sometimes family members, close friends of the family, step parents, babysitters, and other children close to the same age, can be sexually abusive. Sometimes it is those we should be able to trust the most who are abusive. Whether you are at home or at a spend-the-night, you should always be properly supervised to ensure safety. Never secretly go into a room alone with someone, or secretly go away from those who are responsible for you.
Sexual abuse is a violation of trust, especially when the abuser is known to you. Sometimes when children are sexually abused by someone they know, the abuse may happen more than once. Other times the abuse may occur only once, such as a sexual assault (rape). Sometimes it may happen to young girls while going out with someone (date rape). If you are being abused, you must tell someone you trust. You can go to a parent, teacher, doctor, pastor, youth director, Sunday School teacher, or any other adult that you trust. You should know as well that even though you can usually trust these people, sometimes even these adults, may be abusers. Just because someone is in a position of authority does not mean he or she can not be an abuser. If that is the case, then find someone else who will listen and believe what you are telling them.
Abused children often do not trust anyone, which stops them from telling anyone about the abuse, sometimes for several years. The secret nature of childhood sexual abuse or a violent sexual assault is often the very thing that helps the abuse or assaults continue. When anything is done in secret, children sometimes believe it is something they may get in trouble for, and so they instinctively keep the secret. They often experience guilt and shame where there should be none, believing it was something that they did, too. The victim almost always feels that “I’m different,” “Something’s wrong with me,” or that the abuse is somehow “my fault.” If you are a victim, please understand that the abuse may continue and you will likely never completely heal if you continue to keep the abuse secret.
Because sexually abused children sometimes feel they can’t tell any one, they often “forget” the abuse, withdrawing from a conscious awareness of it. The abuse may be vaguely remembered by the victim, but certain experiences may trigger very unplesant feelings and snapshot memories of the abusive situation. Sexual abuse is not something a child can face alone and be completely healthy mentally. Even if they have good parental, community, and spiritual resources, if they keep the abuse to themselves, then they may still have difficulty relating to others in a healthy way.
Telling the secret is the most important part of a victim’s healing process. The Bible tells us that the truth will set us free. Once the victim shares her story with someone she trusts, then that person can see to it that she gets help and that the abuser is not in a position to hurt others.
Responses to an account of childhood sexual abuse will vary depending on who the abuser is and who the victim tells. The hoped for response is one of understanding and support, but victims need to understand that this does not always occur. The shock sometimes causes people to respond in inappropriate ways. Some people simply may not believe your story if it is someone close to them. Even if they believe the abuse happened, some may tell the child to “keep the secret” if it is someone in or close to the family. Some responses will make light of the abuse as child’s play or sexual exploration if the abuser is not of adult age. Children who are exposed to pornography or sexual abuse themselves, often repeat the behaviors they see with other children. Another response is to blame the victim for being unacceptably dressed or behaving inappropriately. Victims should understand that it is not any fault of their own. If you are a victim and someone tells you not to tell anyone or tries to place blame on you, then keep going to someone else until somebody listens. Even if it has been several years, you should seek help in dealing with any issues you may still be facing. You should never stay in the abuse or remain in close contact with the abuser. Victims can find healing; but this usually happens only after several years in safe conditions.
Many victims display an outwardly happy-go-lucky character, while others display clear signals of distress. Those who know a victim should not assume that they are “over it”, just because the victim appears to be moving on with her life. Most victims feel sexual guilt, though they are not responsible for the actions of the abuser. With sexuality being an important part of the whole person, abuse or assault affects one’s total self-concept. The victim often develops upsetting emotions, beliefs, and conduct. The effects of sexual abuse or assault include low self-esteem, unexplained fear of certain people and places, anger, delinquent acting out, depression, suicidal behaviors, promiscuous sexual behavior, sexual disorders, substance or alcohol abuse, eating disorders, and difficulty in close relationships. These may accompany feelings of mistrust, indifference, and/or hatred. If you are a victim and you are experiencing any of these symptoms, you should seek help immediately.
If you are a sexually abused dependent of an abusive parent, step parent, or other relative, then you need to immediately seek help. You can contact any rape crisis center listed in your local telephone directory, or tell someone you trust to help get you out of the abusive situation. You may also contact Go Fish Ministries, as well, and we will try to get you the help that you need through referrals to appropriate sources. You may visit our website at ichthus.biz for further information or call 544-0500 to talk to someone who will refer you to appropriate persons or organizations.



Are You SAD?
(Sexually Abused Dependent)

A response to
Childhood Sexual Abuse
and
Violent Sexual Assault

For more information
contact:
Gofishbooks@jesus
lovesu2.every1.net

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Ministries
76 Mims Rd
Hattiesburg, MS 39401

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiring
Serving Hands


God Bless You!
Get Hooked and Go Fish!



- posted by Unknown @ 10:06 PM

 
A Christian Response to
Childhood Sexual Abuse and Violent Sexual Assault
©2002 Kimberly Hartfield

The secrecy surrounding childhood sexual abuse and violent sexual assault is most often the perpetuating factor in these types of events. When victims keep the secret, it enables the abuser to repeat the crime sometimes against the original victim, as well as against numerous other victims. In order to stop the abusive behavior, victims must be willing to speak out and reveal the identity of their abusers. Telling the secret is the most vital aspect in a victim’s healing process. Scripture tells us that the truth will set us free. Once this ground is broken, the seeds of restoration can emerge from every survivor of C.S.A. or V.S.A. Another integral part of the healing process is taking the victim’s self-blame and placing that blame on the abuser where it truthfully belongs. Finding forgiveness for that abuser through the mercy and grace of the Lord Jesus Christ is also a key point in that process.
The first step in recovery is for the abused person to discern the violation and to tell the secret. The response to the divulgence of sexual abuse or assault is critical to the victim’s ability to recover from the ordeal. A compassionate response is vital to re-establishing trust and getting help for the victim. Christians must never minimize abuse, blame the victim, or tell a child to “keep the secret”. It is imperative that victims receive the assurance that it is not any fault of their own. Counsel should be sought for the victim, and often for the victim’s family members as well. The emotional damage of sexual abuse or assault can be devastating to the victim and to the whole family. Many victims display an outward happy-go-lucky disposition, while others display clear signals of distress. We should not assume that victims are “over it”, just because they appear to be moving on with their life. Most victims commonly experience sexual guilt and with sexuality being integral to the total person, abuse or assault inevitably affects one’s total self-concept. C.S.A. and V.S.A. often interferes with the development of attitudes toward self, sexuality, and relationships. The victim often develops distressing emotions, ideologies, and demeanors. The effects of sexual abuse and assault include low self-esteem, fear, depression, anger, suicidal behaviors, promiscuous sexual behavior, sexual disorders, substance abuse, eating disorders, and difficulty in relationships with a tendency toward involvement with relationships reminiscent of the abusive situation. These are usually characterized by feelings of mistrust, indifference, and/or hatred.
Sexual abuse of a child is considered to be any inappropriate exposing of a child to sexual stimuli by anyone who has influence on the child, in order to erotically arouse that person, without concern for its effects on the child. The abuser must always be held accountable when abuse occurs, because of his or her obvious awareness of sexuality. Even a child who is too young to know that the abuse is wrong will likely develop problems from the inability to cope with this type of stimulation. The secret nature of childhood sexual abuse is often the very thing that perpetuates that abuse. When anything is done in secret, children often believe it is something they would get in trouble for, and so they experience guilt and shame where there should be none, and they instinctively keep the secret, often believing it is their own fault. The victim almost always feels that “I’m different,” “Something’s wrong with me,” or that the abuse is somehow “my fault.” No child can emotionally contend with this kind of abuse alone. As a result, sexually abused children often mentally withdraw from a conscious awareness of the abuse. The victim may have unclear memories, but certain experiences may trigger intensely distressing feelings. Sexual abuse is clearly a betrayal of the child’s trust, especially when the abuser is known to the child. The child often develops a pronounced inability to trust anyone, which prohibits revealing the abuse, sometimes for years. In a child’s eyes, the exposure and consequences of telling may be worse than the abuse itself.
Where prevention of C.S.A. is concerned, parents should talk to their children on several occassions about the difference between good and bad touching, while telling them that they can and must say “no” to any touching or behavior that makes them feel uncomfortable; and that they should tell a trusted adult as soon as possible if this occurs. Parents should never tell a child to do everything an adult tells them to do, while explaining that showing respect does not always mean doing whatever a person in authority says to do. Parents should also be aware that C.S.A. is not invariably perpetrated by a stranger or an adult. Sometimes close friends of the family, family members and other children close to the same age, can be sexually abusive. Children sleeping at home, either alone or with others, and spend-the-nights should always be properly supervised, but even this cannot ensure a child’s safety. Providing a safe, caring, and open environment, so children feel able to talk freely, is vital in both the prevention and the resolution of C.S.A. While children often do not seek help at the time of the abuse, until it is properly dealt with, its damaging effects will likely continue to assault the victim in many areas of the personality and lifestyle.
Christians must be made aware of the extent of C.S.A. and V.S.A. and that many of our sisters and brothers need help in dealing with the conflicts of its aftermath, sometimes even years after the abuse or assault occurred. Christians can help victims find the seeds of healing by encouraging them to use godly means of overcoming the abuse and helping them to grow into the tree of life that God intended them to be. Those Christians who have experienced C.S.A. or V.S.A. themselves and found hope in Jesus, if they are sufficiently healed to be stable enough, should try to comfort others with the consolations they have been comforted with of God. Christian survivors can make other victims aware, not only that they are survivors of the ordeal, but that they can be over-comers in Christ Jesus. Christian comforters can tell other victims that they can be clean from any defilement that they may be feeling as a result of their victimization, and that they too can become a new creation if they have not yet begun that process.
Christians who comfort should pray for victims, while also encouraging them to seek help in dealing with any unresolved issues. Christians should also pray for abusers, because many of them were victims themselves. It is believed that approximately 1/3 of all victims become abusers. The abusers can be told that God’s judgment is sure for the unrepentant and be shown how to seek forgiveness in God’s mercy. Though statistics say that most abusers never stop abusing, some Christians believe that all things are possible with God and that abusers can heal if they are truly repentant, while also seeking professional help. Keeping the abusive patterns secret only perpetuates those patterns. An abuser must be willing to seek help and be held accountable for the misdeeds. Victims should never be coerced into staying in a situation of abuse or in near proximity to the abuser in the hope that the abuser will change. The abuser may change with the help and healing of Jesus, and the victim may forgive the abuser by the grace of God, but the victim must not be compelled to prove forgiveness by remaining in an atmosphere of repeated exposure to abuse or exposure to the abuser. Victims can find true forgiveness for their abusers and experience the grace and healing that goes with it; but this usually happens only after years of a healing process that begins with a safe atmosphere of self-discovery. This environment, along with therapeutic and spiritual counseling with a knowledgeable and compassionate comforter, whether that person be a professional Christian counselor, pastoral counselor, or a lay person survivor, can facilitate the metamorphosis of the new creation in Christ Jesus that every Christian sexual abuse or assault survivor can become.









A
Christian Response to Childhood Sexual Abuse
And
Violent Sexual Assault

For Ordering information contact:

Gofishbooks@jesus
lovesu2.every1.net

Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Ministries
76 Mims Rd
Hattiesburg, MS 39401

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Get Hooked and Go Fish!



- posted by Unknown @ 9:53 PM

 
A Christian Perspective on
Adolescence
©2002Kimberly Hartfield
Adolescence is a tumultuous time in most teenagers’ lives. Almost every teen faces some degree of adolescent insecurity. How a teen perceives the way peers view him/her as a person can be a critical factor in determining that youth’s self-image. An adolescent’s self-worth is determined by both how the teen views him/herself and how that youth believes others see or do not see him/her. If the teen believes he/she is valued by those closest to that youth, he/she will likely have a positive self-image. On the other hand, if the teen is criticized frequently by the significant people in his/her life, the youth may have a poor self-image. The most significant fact a teen needs to know is that he/she is valued and loved. If an adolescent feels despised or undervalued by those who are important to the teen, that young person may become depressed and possibly suicidal unless there is some other significant positive influence in the teen’s life. An adolescent never takes it for granted that he/she is loved.
The young person needs to have some positive verbal feedback from the significant others in his/her life in order to feel personally adequate. There also needs to be some positive physical touching in the form of familial hugs, kisses, and pats of approval from the teens closest loved ones. Without this coveted feedback from the parental-child relationship, the adolescent will often seek emotional and physical needs in a peer relationship, which may lead to early exploration of sexuality and otherwise risky behavior.
This strong desire by the teen to feel appreciated and loved must be fulfilled by the parents or other significant authority figures or the adolescent will inevitably seek approval in his/her peer and/or dating relationships, sometimes in unwelcome ways. A teen’s desire to fit in with peers may be a factor in current behavior trends and parental rebellion, but if the adolescent has a positive and loving relationship with his/her parents, then the teen will ultimately feel secure in his/her individuality and will not easily cave in to unsolicited peer pressure.
Adolescents from Christian homes are often as much at risk as other children in problem areas, including but not limited to rebellion, delinquency, teenage pregnancy, depression, and suicidal behaviors. Split families, dysfunctional families, single parent, and stepfamilies all contribute to the problems that adolescents must overcome to be adequately functioning adults. These types of homes are not foreign to the Christian community. Ideally the parental-child relationship should model God’s unconditional love and acceptance for His children, as well as His discipline and justice. But realistically, worldly influences and sin on both sides of the relationship distort many of these. When this primary relationship is distorted by dysfunctional parents, the children in that family are sometimes left with a void of love in their lives, which they will inevitably attempt to fill with other secondary relationships. The cycle often repeats itself when dysfunctional adolescents become dysfunctional adults.
It is the local churches' responsibility along with the parents to provide ample resources for the teen’s physical and emotional well being along with his/her mental and spiritual well fare and continued Christian growth. The teen must ultimately know that the love of Christ is the only love that can give him/her the unconditional love and acceptance that he/she seeks. Troubled youth need to know that they are not in their world alone and they need not try to walk through it alone. The Church, who are the hands and heart of God, can step in with positive influences and role models. Sunday school teachers, Youth directors, Christian mentors, and plenty of Christian related activities can supplant worldly influences that bide for their time and loyalty.
Activities should be diverse so that they might attract a wide range of teen-agers. Programs should not be primarily musical, study, or activity oriented, but should have a combined emphasis so as not to isolate those who are not inclined in a certain direction. Nor should the activities always be costly, or the youth along with their parents, may feel like outsiders when they can’t afford expensive youth excursions, even though these may be partially funded by the church. It is a wonderful thing when the church gracefully helps those who cannot afford these expenses otherwise, but no one wants to be the one who always needs financial help. Youth gatherings can be done in the church fellowship hall or local homes without the added expense of eating out. When outside activities are warranted, donations and fund raisers should be collected in advance and pooled, with the Church supplementing any additionally needed funds. All the funds should be consolidated, so that no teen feels they have not contributed enough and stays away from church related activities. Many of these activities can be free or relatively inexpensive, such as visiting a local swimming hole, public parks and zoos, appropriate dollar shows, museums, mission trips, Christian concerts and other Church sponsored events, or donation only events.
These adolescent activities and relationships can never replace the parental-child relationship, but they may go a long way in keeping young people occupied in Christian relationships and activities that will likely supplement and hopefully supplant those worldly influences that tend to distract from a Christian lifestyle. As Christian parents, we must be in active spiritual warfare and constant prayer for our youth in today’s culture or we will lose them in a lost and dying world full of satanic influences. They must be physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually prepared to battle for the Lord Jesus Christ. Our youth are our greatest asset in the great commission.
It can not be stressed enough that showing our children we love them is the most important factor in a healthy parental-child relationship. Christian parents have the added responsibility of showing our children God’s unfailing love in spite of the circumstances they find themselves in. We must guide them in righteousness and admonish them to flee from evil influences. Love and forgiveness must be applied in the parental-child relationship for it to be healthy. We must set an example for our children, but know that we are human and that we will err. We must recognize that even the most perfect of all Fathers had his children rebel against Him, too.
About the Author
Kimberly Marie Hartfield is a 38-year-old mother of eight children and a full time student at William Carey College in Hattiesburg, MS. She expects to receive her first degree within the year 2003. She has studied primarily in the areas of Religion, English, and Psychology. She began writing at a young age, both journalizing and poetry, and has continued to enjoy writing throughout her adulthood. She has dedicated her talents to the Lord Jesus Christ and believes that she can be used of God if she is willing and faithful, even in her flawed human condition.
Kim has personally experienced the healing hand of God in facing many of the issues discussed in this series of tracts. God has brought her through many trials during the course of her lifetime, including being a victim of sexual, physical, and mental abuse, a drunk driving accident, pornography addiction, adultery, divorce, remarriage, being jailed, and having experienced two miscarriages and various other trials. Through God’s merciful forgiveness of her own sins and His grace given to her to forgive those who have been her stumbling block, she has overcome these adversities. God has blessed her with the ability to confront and relate these issues to the Christian community in the writing of these tracts.
Kim has been called to the homeland mission field of North America and hopes to be able to use these tracts as a tool for the ministry of witnessing to the grace of God and comforting His people with the truth of His mercy. She claims II Corinthians 3 & 4 as her calling, which states: “Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.” As she herself has received the gift of God’s healing in mind, body, soul, and spirit, she hopes to be able to bring the peace beyond understanding to others in God’s Kingdom with the message of His healing mercy and grace.
Kim’s love for the Lord, along with her passion for writing has drawn her to explore these commonly experienced crisis issues from the perspective of her own experience in the hope that she may bring an empathetic and compassionate insight to God’s people. The views expressed in this series of tracts are strictly her own insights acquired from personal experience and diligent study of the related topics and God’s word concerning them. Her views should not under any circumstance be considered authoritative. She believes that the Christian community’s ultimate authority is the guidance of the human heart by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God in the texts of the Holy Scripture.
For Salvation in Christ
Romans
1:16 I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto Salvation to every one that believes . . .
3:24-25 Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus: Whom God has set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of past sins, through the forbearance of God.
5:10 For if when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by His life.
6:4-5 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like Christ was raised up from the dead, by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in the newness of life. For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also in the likeness of his resurrection . . .
10:8-10 . . . The word is nigh thee, even in your mouth, and in your heart: that is, the word of faith, which we preach; That if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved. For with the heart man believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
Available 2002 Tracts Titles:
1. A Christian Woman’s Perspective on Working Mothers
2. An Essay on Motherhood
3. A Christian Perspective on Discipline
4. A Christian Woman’s Perspective on Contraception and Birth-control
5. A Christian Woman’s Response to The Breast or Bottle Issue
6. A Christian Perspective on Adolescence
7. A Christian Response to Childhood Sexual Abuse
8. A Christian Woman’s Response to Abuse in the Marital Relationship
9. One Christian’s Response to Sexuality and Pornography
10. One Christian’s Perspective on Sexuality
11. A Christian Perspective on Understanding and Resolving Anger and Depression
($1.00 per tract, 10 for $5, 25 for $10, 50 for $15, or 100 for $25) Single tracts may be reproduced in its entirety including copyright and authorship information with permission of author and a fee of $50 for unlimited reproduction. Make Checks Payable to Kimberly Hartfield-Go Fish.

A
Christian Perspective
on Adolescence

For Ordering information contact:

gofishbooks@jesus
lovesu2.every1.net
Or mail inquiries to:
Go Fish Books 4 Jesus
76 Mims Rd
Hattiesburg, MS 39401

Gifts Of
Faith and Inspiration
Second Hand Books

- posted by Unknown @ 9:50 PM